Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Go Ahead And Get Mad Now

Reader Discretion Advised

You MIGHT be offended if you're a:

stay at home mom with an SUV blocking rush hour traffic
rich bitch/kept woman with an SUV blocking rush hour traffic
soccer mom with an SUV blocking rush hour traffic

I swear if I see one more broad in an SUV with a fucking Nike TENNIS HAT on..I'm going to kick her to sleep.
I was trapped in traffic hell behind one of these cows today..just mozeein' along without a care in the world. I guess she decided to veer off to get her Starbuck's fix before she went to the mall and started to straddle BOTH the right turn lane and the main traffic lane.
I was all prepared to lightly tap her bumper and deploy the PIT maneuver but she swerved just in time..bitch
I let my mighty horn blare and she had the NERVE to give ME a dirty look!! If I didn't have a job that I needed to get to ON DAMN TIME, I would have followed her to Starbucks, waited for the Barista to finish her drink and then I would have knocked it off the counter...[insert evil laugh here]

JUST because I'm mean.


skinnylittleblonde said...

Hahaha...they must be married to and/or supported by those cell-phone talking, I can change 5 lanes of traffic without looking, GQ hair sporting, BMW mid-life crisis male drivers from hell.
Oh, this is evil....8 years ago, I bought a 4x4 pick-up truck and I DID TAP that man (described above.) He stopped & jumped out of his car, cell phone still in hand, dramatically professing to the other end that he had just been in an accident.
An Accident! Ha!
I told him "No sir, that was No drive like an Asshole!' and I sped on in to work, where I patiently waited for the police to come & arrest me. The Lincoln that had also gotten run sideways by said man had pulled up along side of us & yelled at him "She's right, you're an oblivious asshole!"
LOL, the cops never came & I haven't done that since.

Vinnie G. said...

Amen! Those women should not be allowed out on the roads until well after rush hour is over. You are so wicked you are now my idol!