Today a co-worker let me know that someone stole one of my Jimmy Dean Croissant Breakfast Sandwiches. We work at a really big company that has lots of divisions.
Our division is one of the few that is allowed to have a refrigerator (we actually have 2).
I bought a box of the sandwiches since they were a good price. 6 sandwiches come in the box. I ate 1 per day for the the past 2 days so that would leave..carry the 1 and divide by the integer..There should be 4 DAMN sandwiches left!! Well guess how many there were..go 'head, I'll wait..Yes!! Only 3 sandwiches left!!
My co-worker said she watched this bitch go into the freezer, take the sandwich, HEAT THE BASTARD UP in the microwave and walk back to her shitty little desk!!
My eagle eyed co-worker decided to investigate since other people aren't supposed to be using the fridge. She opened the freezer and noticed that (cuz I'm smart) my name AND phone number were on the box..the top flap..you HAVE to see it when you open it..Stealing Ho. I tried to give her the benefit of the doubt..maybe she's hungry and/or poor..wait we make pretty good money here..WTF?? Maybe she smokes crack...who knows
I wanted to put a note that said: BITCH, STEALING IS UGLY!! BUY YOUR OWN DAMN BREAKFAST but I refrained.. If I see that cow again, I'll make her choke on the next sandwich.
4 comments:
I suggest a simple sign on your box of sandwiches that says "I have a gun and you don't know where I'm at". Always works for me.
How about a taped on note that says "I pre-licked every piece of food inside this box"
???
that is the best post I have ever read on a blog - EVER!
The sad thing, Morgen, is that they'd probably eat it ANYWAY
I know..so sad
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