He might get choked today..

I work in a tech support call center and I have a co-worker I might choke.
My hate for him grows each day and I KINDA feel bad about it. This seems to be the only place I can share my irritation.

Here is a list of things I can't stand:
For one, he's about 100 pounds overweight with a HUGE STOMACH but makes horrible mean assumptions and comments about plus sized women
(I'll start numbering now)
2. He has a continuous snot whistle that sounds like a piccolo
3.He's too cool to have a lid on his cup but drinks from a straw...gets down to the bottom of the drink and CONTINUES TO SUCK..damn annoying
4.Think he knows EVERY GOD DAMN THING ("Computer problem? Well maybe it's the discombobulator..I know cuz I have one..blah blah blah). I'm going to start calling him "Two-Cents" and see if he catches on.
5. Every time I eat something, he feels the need to lean over the cube wall and strike up a stupid conversation or sometimes..he'll just stare at me and my food with a weird nerd smile.
6.Takes the liberty to shorten my name..as if he knows me like that
7.He giggles...a grown freakin' man that giggles, I just can't take it.
8. He tries to find ways to talk about sex..as if
9. HE GIGGLES!!!! He also has a fat man chortle that I just can't take. I wish there was sound in this blog, I'd record it.
10. He sings really obscure songs that should (in his opinion) relate to whatever we’re talking about and expects you to giggle with the same vigor that he does.
OH THERE'S MORE....
Besides this, he has a wife who is named after a fabric and he basically says she's mildly retarded. I think he's exaggerating but who knows.
He claims to always be on some low carb diet but are Donuts and McDonald's fries on Atkins???
He looks down his nose at me because I'm not married, like his marriage is so great. He says she trapped him into marriage by having a baby and he doesn't even know if it's his. (???)She steals money from him while he's sleeping and has "emotionally" cheated on him. Yeah, you're a whole lot better than me!!