Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Where The HELL Have You Been??

Good Lord, Internet..I've been sitting here for days waiting on you...yes, of course it's irrational for me to blame you when I'm the slack ass...but to me, irrational is sexy.

Anyway, I have been really busy getting my house ready for company.

I'm in a women's investment club that meets at someone's house every month. Since a lot of the women are mothers, they tend to bring their babies/toddlers/adolescents which, as you can imagine, can be really hectic. The last meeting included a 1 year ripping down an entire buffet table, a juice stained chair and lots of cheese ground into the carpet.

For some reason, I volunteered my place on Sunday...yes, I smoke lots of crack.

Gladly, only one child showed up and she stayed in the guest/tv room the entire time without so much as a peep. She looked to be around 11 or 12 but I can never tell with the way kids look these days..she could have been 6 yrs old.

I was the first one to serve liquor and it was a hit. They named it "Happy Punch" and I ended up making two batches..drinking is fun.

Happy Punch aka "Let's Get Rowdy and Talk About Stocks" Punch

Items needed:

1 pretty glass pitcher from an iced tea set that hasn't been out of the box in 6 years
1 Bag crushed ice from the gas station because your ice maker has been broken for a year
1/2 Gallon Tropicana Tropical Punch
1/2 bottle of Malibu Coconut Rum or more if needed

Fill pitcher halfway with ice
Add juice and rum
Mix with wooden spoon while doing a "can't wait to be drunk" dance

To soak up the liquor, I also served mini quiches and cream puffs (but without the chocolate) from the discount club, chips and dips including a guacamole FLAVORED dip..whatever the hell that is...nobody ate it and after reading this article, I can see why.
Oh, and there was fruit..grapes and pineapple and a bottle of Sprite for the non-drinkers. I tried to serve all light colored items in case I had to scrub shit out of the carpet later.

And since I was drunk and forgot to take pictures of my lovely buffet, here are some pics I stole from the Internet:

Do you think I could cram any MORE links into this entry??..jeeesus.

The meeting went well, or as well as I could remember...'s some pictures of my porch that I hooched up for the benefit of the group. And yes, I actually planted those flower boxes and pots all my lonesome. That spiky thing is a houseplant I found at Lowe's and the rest came from Wal-Mart.

The table set came from Joann's and I got it for a freakin' steal since the little cashier dude found a coupon in his garbage can for me..yay, me...the cushions are from Garden Ridge and were way too expensive but I love them and they're staying...oh, and because you like to know random shit about my stuff, I got the plant stand for $3 because it was missing all the nuts and bolts and my pack-rat ass just happened to have extraneous nuts and bolts lying around the house.

TOH says that it seems that I'm not only a crafty bitch, but I'm also a green thumb bitch...And I claim to love this man...

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