Saturday, January 23, 2010

Asian Dudes are HAWT!!

OK, so for the past couple of years I've had this inappropriate fascination with hot Asian guys.

Could it be that I've never actually dated one?

I mean, let's be honest - on a normal day, my cooch could be mistaken for the front lobby of United Nations Headquarters..I've had 'em all thankyouverymuch.

I'm sure that the informers who run and tell my husband every damn thing they see on here are just moist with anticipation right now.

I was goofing off (as usual) at work on the Internet and I came across a photographer named Norm Yip and he is my hero..he has a book called The Asian Male..*sigh* yummy.

But of course, me being stupid as all shit..I decided to go to where you can BUILD YOUR OWN "LOLZ"...I promise you, it's the best thing since maxi pads for big girls (or at least ones with big ole asses).

Anywhooo, here's the product of my boredom and stupidity:

OK..I somebody to come pick my crazy ass up..but you gotta admit that they ARE kinda fine....

Oh, did I mention that I also try to steal cute lil Asian babies at least once a week??

What?..they're just so damn cuuuuute!!

Friday, January 15, 2010

Keith Olbermann Is The MuthaFukkin' Man!!

Ok so..I try not to get into the whole "politics/religion" thing..because people are haters here in the Bible Belt South...but Keith always says what I'm thinking and am too afraid to say out loud:

and just in case that one has been removed...(sorry, I'm at work and YouTube is blocked here)

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Yeah..Not Really In The Mood For Bullshit This Year

Life Update:

It still sucks ass

Yay for updates!!

I have mind alteringly painful cramps today so I'm just a ball of fucking sunshine.

There's an ice storm going on right now..and my employers fully expect US to show up..but they can "work from home"..fuckers

What else...hmm..lemme see

Belly's sister wore a celadon green sweat suit to work Friday..she looks like a 400 pound lima bean..or better yet..Roz fom Mon.sters Inc:

Woo..I slay me

Oh, and my parents are STILL in my guest room...sigh
I promise, if it was just my Mom staying there it would be cool because she's very quiet and unobtrusive...but my damn Step Dad is - in a word - GROSS.
It took everything in me not to vomit all over the keyboard thinking of how he just sits on my guest bed belching, breathing heavy, moaning from "so called" body aches, grunting and blowing his nose..

All. Fuckin'. Day.

Small things get to me..I guess it's an OCD thing.
Every time I go in there to use the computer..he's in there..just festering
So I try to ignore him, I even turn my headphones up to "level 11"..AND I CAN STILL HEAR HIM!!

edited to add: For fuck's sake..he's taken to eating ALL of his meals in my guest room now..he rarely leaves said room..great, I guess I can look forward to squatters AND roaches.

Oh and this: He hums when he eats.. WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT??

I just want some time to my damn self to play IMVU, goof off on Facebook and hell, even look at some funny porn movie outtakes!!

umm..huh?...just act like you didn't see that last part


I really want to lose weight this year...yeah, I say that EVERY year but this time I mean it...shut up..I'm serious...ok if you're gonna laugh that loud, at least take it outside.

I've decided to call this little initiative:
"One Piece (with a sarong) Fine" By Summer Time
(because "Bikini Fine" is just asking for too much right now.)

I went to the gym today and walked a mile on the treadmill. Both, for the first time in ass felt like it was on fire for the first few minutes but somehow I survived. Plus, it gave me a place to go that ISN'T the cluster-fuck of my house or work.

Hmm..maybe having squatters will be a great way to lose weight..MAYBE